NFL WEEK 11 PICKS

NFL WEEK 11 PICKS

If the NFL logos tie wasn’t bad enough we can now proudly say that Toronto’s Mayor has been effectively banned from a Canadian Football League game, and asked not to wear their jerseys.  Guess he could just stay home and eat p***y… seeing as how there’s plenty enough of that there.  Good grief.  But it’s Week 11 and time’s running out for teams to make the playoffs.  As often happens in the NFL, there are weak divisions and strong divisions.  It doesn’t make it easier to pick a game but it does mean that weaker teams make it to the Super Bowl and can go up against a powerhouse.  This makes for a crap final.  I don’t want to go there.

Going into WEEK 11 @ 87-60 with 8 correct last week.

Atlanta @ Tampa Bay

Taking Tampa.  Atlanta has not won on the road yet and disappointment comes from elevated expectations of others behavior.  Therefore I do not expect them to do anything different than they already have.

The New York Jets over Buffalo

I don’t care where they play.  I’m not taking Buffalo

Detroit over Pittsburgh

All things considered and if Detroit is firing on all cylinders – they should run right over Pittsburgh.

Washington over Philly

Philly is playing better and have won their last games but those wins come over teams that are less than stellar.  Washington plays with heart and they don’t give up easily. Taking Washington

Chicago over Baltimore

If the stars align then Chicago’s ability to score should outweigh their sieve of a defensive line.  Beyond that Baltimore is quickly becoming my new Buffalo.

Cincinnati over Cleveland

Cinci is due for a win and sometimes it’s as simple as that.

Oakland over Houston

These two are equally bad – therefore I am taking the best of the badness that they collectively are and giving it to Oakland.

Arizona over Jacksonville

The only reason that Jax won that game last week is that Tennessee shit their own bed, changed the sheets at half time, and then proceeded to soil it again.  Jacksonville may be buoyed by the win but Arizona is still a better team statistically and (should) can beat them.

San Diego over Miami

San Diego for all intents and purposes is marginally better than the Fish.  Perhaps Miami can capture an honorary win with honorary players.  Take San Diego.

Seattle over Minnesota

Seattle is better at home, and Minnesota has only won at home (giving them the London game). Which they’re not.  They’re on the road in Seattle.  Case closed.

New Orleans over San Francisco

If you take a look at their win records you’ll find that yes they’ve won games but neither has shellacked a really strong contender.  San Fran struggled somewhat against Carolina last week so I’m giving this to experience and the home team.  Take New Orleans.

New York Giants over Green Bay

Giants and Eli have rallied over last few weeks while Green Bay has floundered.  This is a must win for the Giants.

Denver over Kansas

Denver has one loss this season and Kansas is sitting on Peyton’s undefeated throne.  This, I’m sure displeases him greatly.  Denver is at home and with the pissed off/wicked smart combo under a Mile High Stadium Taurus Full Moon that is Manning tonight … well I wouldn’t mess with him.  Take Denver.

New England over Carolina

Tom Brady doesn’t have nearly the edginess of Peyton’s game face but he surely doesn’t want to lose to a still wet behind the ears Cam Newton.

MAYBE TOM

 tom brady crying

could do less of this and more of this

peyton manning mad facewhich will result in more of this

cam newton with towel on headTake New England

TP&LB

 

 

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NFL WEEK 11 THURSDAY NIGHT INDY @ TENNESSEE

Indianapolis Colts @ Tennessee Titans NFL Thursday Night

Indianapolis Colts at Tennessee Titans

(I make these Thursday Night Picks pics myself … can’t help throwing a little crafty photoshopping in there:)

Last week Indy fans could be heard shouting, whispering, wailing …”Are you fucking kidding me?”  Lose? to St. Louis? @ home?  by 30 freaking fumbling farting around points?   Tonight Tennessee’s Locker is out and Indy should be so embarrassed with their most recent on field debacle that the entire game should be played in Tennessee’s red zone.  Truth is that this is a divisional game, and on a points for and points against level they’re not that far apart.  I’m going to take Indy…. again.  Because just like last week…they should win this one.

TP&LB

NFL WEEK 10 PICKS… OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT

WEEK 10

Freaking genius move on my part taking Minnesota in the Thursday Game.  I hope I haven’t peaked too early.  🙂

 

Going into Week 10 with a 79-54 record (not including Thursday)

Week 10 brings us some difficult games to pick… most times what seems most obvious is the hard choice.  Most disconcerting while checking rushing, passing and other stats (like I really know what they mean) was finding our illustrious and alleged crack head Mayor, Rob Ford on NFL. Com., for wearing an NFL novelty tie during his “yes I did it” news conference.  Here’s the link:

Toronto Mayor Rob Ford NFL Logo Tie 

Onward and upward: 

Tennessee Titans over Jacksonville

If I only had a football team to pick from.  But I don’t so I’ll just take Tennessee at home. 

Green Bay Packers over Philly

Whose record is real here?  I’m hoping that Green Bay will be pissed off still from losing to Chicago last week and pound the living snot out of Philly. 

Pittsburgh over Buffalo

I loathe them both.  They both play to within points of whoever else they’re playing which makes it difficult for you point spread pickers out there. 

NY Giants over Oakland

Even though they are both improving teams, Oakland has not won on the road yet.  That The Giants are 7 point faves surprises me a bit because neither team are point scorers.  Oakland’s got a pretty good D so how Eli and the not so giant Giants are going to beat them by more than 7 remains to be seen.

Indianapolis Colts over St. Louis Rams

St. Louis can’t score … certainly not with any consistency and Indy has a huge defensive game. 

Seattle Seahawks over Atlanta Falcons

Seattle scores more and lets in less and they need and want this game. 

Cincinnati Bengals over Baltimore Ravens

This one is there for the taking.  But by who? Cinci can take it on the road and win.  I don’t think it’ll be a big points game and if it is, both teams will be scoring.  Cinci has won 3 by 3, lost 1 by 2 and 1 by 3.  Baltimore has lost 2 by 3 and 1 by 2.  I’m taking Cinci because I like them more. 

Chicago over Detroit Lions

Chicago is the better team at home and Detroit has lost half their road games.  In my world of mathematics that makes Chicago the better team.  I can’t explain it any better than that. 

Carolina Panthers over San Francisco 49rs

San Fran is good at home and they do have a good defensive record.  Thing is that both have beat shit teams to get their respective win records.  San Fran is coming off a bye week, but Cam and Carolina are on a roll.  These are two still wet behind the ears QBs with something to prove. 

Arizona over Houston

Arizona at home.  I had a good reason but it escapes me now.  It must have bored me as much as the prospect of this game does.

San Diego Chargers over Denver Broncos

Yes, I’m taking San Diego.  Yes, Denver has a great record but they have beaten the worst teams in the league.  San Diego beat the team that beat Denver.  San Diego is at home and they want this very very very much.

New Orleans Saints over Dallas Cowboys

(finally a Sunday Night Game that looks to have some backbone to it) New Orleans is a much better (much much better) defensive team.  Tony Romo is a p***y.  That pretty much sums it up for me.

Miami over Tampa or Tampa over Miami

Tampa is the almost made it team of the year losing within 3 points twice, by 2 once and by 1 once.  So they don’t exactly play up to the level of better teams, but they do seem to keep pace…. Try to anyway.  Miami is a team in an upheaval of accusations and locker roof strife which can spill onto the field if morale has been damaged to the point of defeat.  I’m going to go out on a plank here and go with the Buccaneers.  

TP&LB

NFL WEEK 7 … who will win?

NFL WEEK 7 PICKS TO WIN

WEEK 7

Coming into Week 7 @ 52-40

Yes, I let emotion play into that Week 7 Thursday Night pick when I took Arizona over Seattle – won’t let that happen again.  Now in the grand scheme of things I’m one back.  What’s at stake here is a set of Zildjian’s … hi hats or crash or something else loud.  I’ve got my eye on a lovely tablet.  As they say, I’m not playing.  I want my tablet.  Chili in the slow cooker, laundry done, and I’m ready to watch.

New England over the Jets

These two are actually quite well matched and it should be a good game but I’m going with Brady on this one.

San Diego over Jacksonville

Jax still struggling but this could be one of those games you should have boxed but you didn’t because how could San Diego lose?

Kansas City Chiefs over Houston

Schaub is out for Houston and Kansas has a killer D.

Cincinnati Bengals over Detroit

Out on a limb here but Calvin Johnson is “probable” whatever the fuck that means in the real world.  Okay, I know what it means but even when he does play he’s either on or he’s off.  Some games he’s neither.

Miami Dolphins over Buffalo

I would take whoever else there was against Buffalo any day (we’ve been over this before). But I like the Dolphins.  They’re at home.  Ricky would take them.  I think.

Chicago over Washington

Days gone by Washington @ home would be a lock but RG111 is still getting comfortable on that knee (and I don’t blame him).  Chicago is a tough team.

Philly over Dallas

Dallas has some injuries – DeMarcus and DeMarco, Philly’s Vick is questionable.  If Vick is in then Dallas might just spend too much time trying to kick the shit out of him instead of playing.  Big Daddy Jones will be watching though…

Carolina Panthers over St. Louis Rams

Carolina has a good D and Cam Newton (when he doesn’t have that ridiculous towel on his head) seems to be getting back to business.

Atlanta Falcons over Tampa Bay

Just because

Tennessee Titans over San Francisco

Kaepernick is getting back up to speed and he’s throwing the ball well.  Tennessee isn’t going to give up this game lightly.

Green Bay over Cleveland Browns

Even though Green Bay has some injured players they haven’t lost at home yet.  Sometimes it’s that simple.

Pittsburgh Steelers over Baltimore

It could be argued that any team needs any game at any time, but the Steelers need this game.  Really need it.  Defensively both are pretty tough so maybe they should just stay in their own ends and kick the ball back and forth.

Denver Broncos over Indy

The Manning/Luck battle returns to the turf.  Apparently both fathers QB’d … Lucks actually for Indy.  I should know where Manning’s played but I don’t care to find out or to remember.  That was then and this is now.  There is mucho hype surrounding this game because of the return of Peyton to Indianapolis.  But isn’t this a little like going back and sleeping with your ex.  It’s not like it’s a surprise, you know it’s going to end badly for one, and everyone wants to know the details.  Can you imagine how much the networks are charging for advertising during this game?  You can show me a hundred times; I’m still not buying a fucking truck pushed by Denis Leary or Sam Elliot. In fact I’m not buying a truck period.  Show me something else… or show me the freaking game. Did I say I was taking Denver?

Monday night letdown

Taking the New York Giants over Minnesota with hopes Little Manning can play like Big Manning and he and his team can get the job done.

TP&LB

 

Week 4 NFL Picks, Pokes, and Ponders

Yes, I picked St. Louis for Thursday Night — Unfortunately St. Louis didn’t pick themselves and this display of Kaepernick -ing by Robert Quinn

811340402

 

Was a little bit premature…. in the grand scheme of things as San Fran did beat them 35 to 11.  Yeah, thanks for that.  More time playing please and less time on the theatrics.

WEEK 4 PICKS — THE REST

GOING IN AFTER WEEK 3 @ 30-18 (not counting that Thursday Night debacle just yet)

In London — Pittsburgh over Minnesota Vikings — Someone’s gotta win and someone’s gotta lose.  Hopefully Big Ben, in close proximity to the actual Big Ben, will get his timing right.  Maybe there’ll be some sort of almighty syncing of all things football.

Baltimore over Buffalo — you know by now how I feel about Buffalo — and it stems back to that Quarterback (who shall remain nameless) that wore a freaking white head band — and it wasn’t the 80s — play football for God’s sake — screw the hair — get dirty.  I digress — Baltimore over Buffalo.

Cincinnati over Cleveland — just because that’s what I think.  Well, apparently Orange is the new Black.

Indy over Jacksonville — we shouldn’t have to talk about this.

Seattle over Houston — I think Russell Wilson, the least hyped of the new young QBs, has got it going on.  Seattle Seahawks are better at home, but they’re getting better on the road.

Tampa Bay over Arizona — this one troubles me somewhat.  Two crappy teams playing each other usually means a crappy game …. but Any Given Sunday … anything can happen.

Chicago over Detroit — I may regret this one but Detroit hasn’t fully proven their ability yet, they’re a little all over the place and they have some injuries.  We’ll see.

Kansas City Chiefs over The New York Giants.  There is no reason why Kansas can’t win this.

I’m going way way  way out there and taking The New York Jets over Tennessee.

Dallas over San Diego — This is another tough one in a week of tough ones.

Washington Redskins (are they going to change that name?) over Oakland.  Oakland’s got a tough defensive line but Washington can put up some points.  It’s time for Washington to get their fingers out of their collective butts and get to playing some football.

Denver over Philly — The elder Manning ain’t giving up anything in his own backyard.  His house, his rules.

New England Patriots over Atlanta — New England isn’t putting up a lot of points — just enough to win, which in the straight up world I’m living in, is in fact, just enough.

New Orleans over Miami — I expect the Big Fish to put up a good fight when the Saints try to reel them in.  If New Orleans doesn’t run out of steam they’ll be having a good ole fish fry after the game.

 

WEEK 3 NFL ….LET’S GO HARD

I don’t mean me of course – I mean the teams – Let’s go harder…as in throw it, catch it, score with it.

Taking:

NY Giants over Carolina – both are 0-3 and someone’s gotta win.

Tennessee over San Diego – San Diego burned me last week by having the audacity to beat Philly.  As a true Woman, I tend not to forget these things.

Minnesota over Cleveland – Home team – rocking the purple and gold.

New England over Tampa – NE is 2-0, Tampa is 0-2. Doubtful that NE is going to give it up to the Buccaneers in their own backyard.

Houston over Baltimore – Home team advantage and nothing more.

Dallas over St. Louis – Come on Tony Romo, I’m giving you one more chance at home. Please don’t fuck it up.

New Orleans over Arizona – New Orleans is marginally better at home than away.  Arizona is better at home.  Simple math.

Washington over Detroit – Hoping hoping hoping that RG111 and his team are gonna get their act together.  Washington’s one of my old time all time fave teams and I want it to stay that way. If I have to dump you it’s gonna be like dumping that guy that’s really good in bed … but he’s still gotta go.

Cincinnati over Green Bay – Green Bay scores a lot but they give up a lot of points.  Cinci’s ability to stop people holding the brown oblong ball appears to be fairly solid.Time will tell.

Miami over Atlanta – You ask me, why?  I ask you, why not?

San Fran over Indy – San Fran is heavily favored and they are good at home.  Can they cover?  Maybe, maybe not, but they sure as shit can win.

Seattle over Jacksonville – Honestly – your family dog could pick this one.

Buffalo over the Jets – I don’t like this game – I don’t like it at all.

Chicago over Pittsburgh – Pittsburgh is at home and days gone by it’d be a sure bet to take them.  This season, not so much.

Denver over Oakland – Peyton doesn’t like to lose – it seems to take him a quarter or two to get going but when he does… Oakland should just get out of the way.

I’ll be cooking burgers on the grill in that waffly time frame between the early and late games.  Dress them yourselves and get your own liquid refreshments, I haven’t the time. Fortunately the Sunday Night Game is not one that’s grabbing me because you don’t watch every season of Dexter to miss or delay the Final Show of all time ever.  It better be good.

NFL WEEK 2 BREAKDOWN

Hey, I might break down … but it’s not that bad is it?  Week 2 is still anybody’s game — no one team has come out as on top of anything, not defensively, not offensively, and not any one position …there’s been some outstanding plays and players but it’s too early to suggest that there’s any kind of consistency  at all.

STRAIGHT UP RECORD SO FAR — 9 WINS & 7 LOSSES

GOING IN TO WEEK 2

NEW ENGLAND OVER THE JETS — GOT THIS ONE — IT WAS THURSDAY’S GAME

PHILLY OVER SAN DIEGO — Philly kind of had it going on agains Washington and San Diego last Monday were there but that’s about it.

BALTIMORE OVER CLEVELAND — not sure Baltimore’s that good or that Cleveland is that bad

HOUSTON OVER TENNESSEE — I’d box this if I could but I’m taking Houston @ home

INDY OVER MIAMI — I think that the Colts have more to promise than the Dolphins do

BUFFALO OVER CAROLINA — this is Buffalo’s only chance not to freaking screw me over

ST LOUIS OVER ATLANTA — I may live to regret this one

GREEN BAY OVER WASHINGTON — Washington and RG111 will have to have done a shit load of work since last Monday

KANSAS OVER DALLAS — Is Romo hurt? Can he play?  Did Kansas kick the snot out of Jax last week or is Jax just that bad?

CHICAGO OVER MINNESOTA — when in doubt go home team … or something like that

NEW ORLEANS OVER TAMPA — hoping that Tampa will hand over this game just like the served it to the Jets in Week 1

DETROIT OVER ARIZONA — if Reggie and Megatron and Stafford can get their shit show together — they should win it

OAKLAND OVER JACKSONVILLE — taking the home team over the vile visitors (aka defensive and offensive missing)

DENVER OVER THE GIANTS — The Manning showdown — NYG were awful last week and the elder Manning’s experience should give Denver an edge

SEATTLE OVER SAN FRANCISCO — this pains me to take but the Seahawks are, or have been, hard to beat at home

CINCIE OVER PITTSBURGH — they’re favored to win and the Steelers did nothing last week to make me think they’ll win this week.