NFL WEEK 17 PICKS …. the show’s not over yet

Week 17 NFL … the show’s not over yet.

Lot’s of action still in the league as teams jockey for position in the playoffs.  Point in case is that there is not one NFC division decided.

Last week: 9-7

Season: 139-101

Carolina Panthers over Atlanta

Despite Cam Newton’s lesser show on the road he can still get it done, even if he has to run the ball himself, which he does.  Atlanta can’t get to there from there because the Panther D won’t let them.

Tennessee Titans over Houston Texans

Houston can’t score their way out of wet paper bag and even though the Titans aren’t top notch they should be able to hand Houston a loss and keep the Texans at the absolute bottom of the league.

Pittsburgh Steelers over Cleveland

Pittsburgh needs this game to stay in the race for anything.  They’ll get it as Cleveland’s record against them in Pittsburgh is a no go.  However Pittsburgh also needs the cards to fall in all the correct win loss categories throughout the league for it to actually mean anything for them.  Still, they’re not just going to give it up.

New York Giants over Washington

Washington does not have a hope in hell of making the playoffs, how well they play may be determined by how determined Cousins is to keep the play spotlight on himself.  Manning would like to end this less than stellar season with a win at home.

Cincinnati Bengals over Baltimore Ravens

Actually I just like the Bengals. They have more to gain with a win over Baltimore as they’re playing for the AFC’s No. 2 Seed; Baltimore is just trying to get an invite to the dance.   Actually, I just like the Bengals.  Did I say that already?

Indianapolis Colts over Jacksonville Jaguars

Indy has already clinched the Division but I don’t expect that will stop them from handing the Jaguars their final loss of the season.

Miami Dolphins over the New York Jets

This should be a hard fought battle.  Miami needs the win and Baltimore to lose to get in on the post-season fun.  The Jets don’t do so well on the road…

Minnesota Vikings over Detroit Lions

Despite the Lions dismal display of on and off field team togetherness they’ve somehow managed to hold on to…oh, they haven’t held on to anything.  Minnesota may be without their go to guy in Peterson and Detroit’s Megatron is questionable (at point of writing) but both of these teams have shown the ability to pull a surprise win or loss out of their collective jockstraps.  Taking Minnesota at home.

Green Bay Packers over Chicago Bears

Rodgers returns to the fold and the question is whether he’ll play cautiously (a la RG111) or pull out all the stops.  I’m thinking he’s gonna give it all he’s got and all he’s got will be enough to stop The Bears in their own corner of the forest.

New England Patriots over Buffalo

This is down to a battle of the QB’s.  Brady can do it and I really hope that he doesn’t wait to the last 2 minutes of the game to actually get it done.

New Orleans Saints over Tampa Bay Buccaneers

New Orleans wants and needs this game and Tampa is beyond all help.  Tampa should just let their hair down and play like they’re fighting it out in the field behind the school to see who gets to date the Head Cheerleader.  That’d be a good game to watch.

Denver Broncos over Oakland Raiders

Good night Oakland.  Thank goodness this isn’t the Sunday Night game.  Doing laundry would be more entertaining.

San Diego Chargers over Kansas City

Even though Kansas looks better on paper and can win on the road, their play of late hasn’t been what we’d expect.  San Diego is hot these last few games and the fire’s not going out just yet.

It’ll be a well-fought battle to the last seconds of the game.

Seattle Seahawks over St. Louis

Seattle is still smarting from their loss at home last week to Arizona, but not enough to lose focus and lose this one as well.

Dallas Cowboys over Philly

It’s the end of the season and I don’t have anything to lose with taking the hapless Cowboys over Philly.  I’m not a Romo fan neither do I subscribe to the premise that a team is based solely on the strength of one man. Dallas at home it is.

Tight Pants & Leather Balls

NFL WEEK 16 PICKS …trickier than it seems

NFL WEEK 16 PICKS

Things are getting trickier to pick.  Early on in any season it’s brawn and just plain old wanting to win that fuels the competitiveness. Yes, everything counts towards a playoff spot but right about now things get complicated because getting there can sit in the balance with who loses to whom as important as who wins against who.  This week there are only 3 games that don’t have playoff implications: Browns & Jets, Titans & Jaguars, and the Buccaneers & Rams.  You can find the ins & outs on line but you have to be a mathematician to figure that shit out… which I’m not, having dropped math in Grade 9 … cause you could in those days 🙂

My selfish fears this week are that the power will go out at 1pm with this southern Ontario ice storm … thank you Texas, or that the only games available for viewing will be a combo of the 3 games that really don’t matter.

Last week: 9 and 7

Year totals: 130 and 94

Miami Dolphins over Buffalo Bills

Beyond my oft-expressed hatred of Buffalo, statistically these two are well matched.  Miami might have to have their skates on to play in this weather and sitting in that open venue in Buffalo today won’t be an easy thing but Miami has beaten stiffer competition both on and off the road.

Carolina over New Orleans Saints

Carolina has not lost at home since Week 1 and the New Orleans road game has room for improvement.  They’re as much as tied for the NFC South and this is Newton’s chance to really show us what he’s got … or to go home with a towel on his head.  Who would choose to do that?

Dallas Cowboys over Washington

The disruptive drama that is the Redskins continues.  Dallas needs this game and they’ll be coming to Washington to get it.  The home team here left the building some time ago and despite their renewed efforts with Cousins, it’s still a case of too little too late.

St. Louis over Tampa Bay Buccaneers

St. Louis sits at the bottom of the NFC West and Tampa’s not sitting much better over in the NFC South, which is why this game is one of the no one cares games. St. Louis runs very hot and cold but one really does have to give them the home team advantage.

New York Jets over Cleveland Browns

(Another change the channel game)  Cleveland is very capable of losing by mere points and at the same time have scored 100 more points than the Jets for the season.  Defensively they’re pretty close. I’m taking the Jets because they’re very capable of pulling an unlikely upset out of their pockets.  They’re minimally favored at home and because that’s all this game has to offer … I’ll take it.

Kansas City over Indianapolis

Based on the Kansas D, I’m going with them.  Do think though that it’ll be a hard fought game … Indy’s not going to lay down and take it.

Cincinnati Bengals over Minnesota

I like Cincie and I like them more at home.  Peterson is reported to being playing for the Vikings but it’s their D that’s the problem, and they’re not, or haven’t been, 2 in a row winners.  Cincie is finishing the season with 2 home games and the home crowd should carry them the distance they need to go.

Denver Broncos over Houston Texans

Denver does throw a shoe on occasion and ends up on the wrong end of an upset … but to Houston for cripes sake?

Jacksonville over Tennessee

Not a question of who’s better, but one of who’s worse.  This is the kind of game that will fuck up your pick card.  Taking Jax @ home just because I have to pick someone to win.

Seattle Seahawks over Arizona

The noise machine that is Seattle at home should kick into gear … I think I can hear them now … from here.  This is the first of Seattle’s season ending home game schedule and Arizona might want to this game but they’re not going to get it.

Detroit Lions over the New York Giants

Stafford has just been declared the most undisciplined QB in the league… and the Lions as out of control as a whole for their often own play ending penalties and questionable coaching plays.  Oh, the Motor City, every one’s a critic.  But it’s The Giants for Christmas sake.

San Diego Chargers over Oakland Raiders

These 2 are at the bottom and the bottom bottom of the AFC West. San Diego should still be up over their surprise win (I was surprised) in Denver last week.

Green Bay Packers over Pittsburgh Steelers

The answer to will he or won’t he play is that he won’t.  Still taking Green Bay @ home.

Baltimore over New England

New England has been struggling of late and they struggle more on the road.  Their wins in December have been by points against both Houston and Cleveland, which are not powerhouse teams to begin with.  Gronkowski is missed, no doubt about that.  Baltimore does the same thing points wise the key here is that they score less but they stop more.

Philly over Chicago

Philly wants and needs this and Chicago wants and needs this. Chicago can win, and has won on the road but they are more inclined to lose traveling.  Philly is favored here by the standard 3-point home advantage gift … and sometimes that’s all you need to get it done.  Hopefully that’s what they’ll do.

San Francisco 49rs over Atlanta

Will San Francisco lose = no.  Will they win by 12 = no.  I’m just putting that out there.

Tight Pants and Leather Balls

 

NFL WEEK 14 … THE REST OF THE GAMES

NFL WEEK 14

No I didn’t get the Thursday Night Game – Houston did not beat Jacksonville – Houston didn’t do much of anything at all.  They did fire Coach Kubiak though.  No doubt only the first of several coaches that will be walking the unemployment line instead of the sideline by season’s end.

Win Loss record going in this week is 110 – 82 and I’m not saying I really will do this, but if I can’t pull it out this week I might as well watch Oprah’s Master Class on Sunday Night instead of the Atlanta / Green Bay game.

Let us begin:

Kansas over Washington

(Chiefs and Redskins – both of these teams need to do something about that)  RG111 has been having a hard time keeping it real this season but to his credit he’s still trying out there, even though at times it seems cautious.  Both on the low scoring side but Kansas does have a better D … AKA in this case as actually having a D.

Baltimore Ravens over Minnesota Vikings

Baltimore is good at home and Minnesota has only won at home (or in London, England).  Adrian Peterson is giving it everything he’s got but he can’t win on his own.

New England over Cleveland

New England can take this but if it’s by the large point spread suggested by odds makers remains to be seen.

Oakland Raiders over The New York Jets

Oakland can pull it out of their *ss crack when they have to.  The Jets will need more than a home field advantage to pull this out of their *ss crack.

Cincinnati over Indy

Indy has beat formidable opponents but more often than not they do that at home. Cinci on the other hand hasn’t lost at home.

New Orleans over Carolina

No, I’m not riding the Newton train on this one.  I expect that New Orleans has recovered and regrouped from that routing they experienced in Seattle last week.  These two are effectively tied for the AFC South and it’s not whether Carolina can win but whether New Orleans is willing to give that win up.  I suspect not.

Detroit over Philly

Detroit has lost to teams better than Philly has beat.  Does that make sense to you?  It makes sense to me and speaks to a level of play.  Detroit can beat a good team and Philly can beat crap teams.  Now does it make sense?   We’ll see.  If Stafford and Johnson can get their groove on down the field then Detroit can beat Philly too.

Pittsburgh Steelers over Miami Dolphins

Another spread on this game that suggests it’s anyone’s game to win and the only expected edge Pittsburgh has is home field advantage.  I’ll take that.

Tampa Bay over Buffalo

Against my own advice to myself I took Buffalo to win last week – and they did not.  As above, home field is the only advantage that Tampa Bay has.  And as above, I’ll take that too.

Mayor Rob Ford at Atlanta Buffalo NFL game

Toronto Mayor Rob Ford enjoying a wing or two  at the Atlanta Buffalo Game in Toronto last week…and apparently in a seat that wasn’t really his to take.  

Denver Broncos over Tennessee Titans

Why are we talking about this?

Arizona Cardinals over St. Louis

Arizona is just plain old playing better.  Nuff said.

San Diego over the New York Giants

Yes Eli and the big boys have improved of late but does beating Washington and Green Bay reflect their ability to knock it out on the field against a stronger (than GB & Wash) team.  You certainly couldn’t say that the Chargers are consistent with anything and they have been all over the place.  This week, seeing as how they’re in their own place, I’ll take them over the Giants.

Seattle Seahawks over San Francisco

Seattle has clinched a play off spot.  If Monday’s shellacking of the Saints is any indication then this team doesn’t have an “off” switch to ease off on playing hard to minimize injury or the chance of injury to their most important players.  This is also a battle of the new generation of QBs and too think that Kaepernick might not be bothered at all by Wilson’s recent elevation to QB Demi-God would be unwise.  Yes, San Fran is good at home but Seattle appears to be just plain old good everywhere they go and neither of these QBs or Teams wants to give an inch.  Going with Seattle.

Eyebrow to Eyebrow in Week 2 but it's a little more serious this time round...

Eyebrow to Eyebrow in Week 2 but it’s a little more serious this time round…

Green Bay over Atlanta

Rodgers is still out but willing to take a chance on them at home.  Atlanta has only won at home … but this week they’re not.

Chicago over Dallas

Taking Chicago at home – if they come out hard and keep it up they can take Dallas.  I say keep it up because Dallas tends to come on strong later in the game.  I know this because I often think I’ve got them in the bag as losing … and then they freaking win.  Chicago has my vote here and I hope there’s a stiff wind off the lake it’s cold enough to freeze the nuts off a squirrel.  I think that would help Da Bears just enough to get it done.

TP&LB

NFL WEEK 13 THANKSGIVING THURSDAY GAMES

NFL WEEK 13 THURSDAY NIGHT GAMES 

I’ve never read any of the big official game pickers come out and say they sucked the previous week – but I’m going to own that.  5-9.  Dreadful – still if there’s a time to get that SHIT WEEK in it’s now, before I need the big score at season’s end.

American Thanksgiving gives us 3 games and they really need to mix these up a bit and give us other teams to watch…unless it’s tradition like that ridiculous 4-6 legged turkey the NFL commentators gnaw on after the show.

Season record 102-74

Detroit over Green Bay

Green Bay’s QB is trying to fill Rodger’s cleats and not doing too badly and Detroit of late has been just missing the mark, admittedly that mark is all over the field.  A loss at home to Tampa last week should have them embarrassed enough to … do better this week.  These two are pretty well matched statistically and being at home is an advantage to Detroit.  Taking Detroit.

Dallas over Oakland

Very troublesome.  Dallas’ advantage is in their scoring game having racked up 100 more points for the season.  Defensively they’re within 20.  Taking Dallas.

Baltimore over Pittsburgh

This will be a hard fought divisional battle.  They’re both 5-6. Baltimore wins in the D department and rushing a few extra yards. Pittsburgh has Baltimore on passing and total yards per game.  It’s going to be an Any Given Sunday kind of night and hopefully end in Baltimore’s favor.

NFL WEEK 12 …. what’s love and condoms got to do with it

NFL WEEK 12

(ALREADY?)

Deion Sanders Condom Question

Apparently while I’m trying to make a decision between picking Denver or New England, Deion Sanders is fielding twitter questions/responses about whether to give a 16 yr. old boy condoms or not. Yes, and double up Buttercup while you’re at it. Then (whoever asked this) get out a banana (uh, not yours, an actual yellow banana. Cripes, what the fuck is wrong with you?) and show him how to put it on. Otherwise it’s like giving him the keys without showing him how to drive the car. And Deion, cloth covered buttons are… uh, not so much.

Here’s a portion of the twitter feed if you’re so inclined.

Now back to the business of NFL Sunday

Last week’s win/loss was 10/5 making season totals 97/65

Detroit over Tampa Bay

Detroit at home and Megatron’s new shoe line with a freaking Transformer … how could Detroit lose?

Houston over Jacksonville

The only thing to do here is to take the home team.  They’re hugely favored which means jack shit but in reality it only takes 1 point to win the game.  Take Houston.

Green Bay over Minnesota

Green Bay earlier in the season was a no other choice but they’re not really living up to that these days.  Minnesota has a pair of fishnet stockings with holes in them for a defensive line.  Prove me wrong, but I’m going with Green Bay.

Kansas over San Diego

Kansas is back home after having their undefeated season dreams crushed by Denver.  Their PF records are pretty close but San Diego has let in almost 100 points more than Kansas.  So should be a game of who can stop the other guy better.

Carolina over Miami

Carolina has a brick wall defense and Miami are not big scorers and the back room dramas continue. Newton (like him or not) is on a roll.  Take Carolina.

Cleveland over Pittsburgh

Both AFC, both have 4 wins, both win @ home.  AKA anyone’s game.  The question is, who’s going out to play, and who’s going out to kick the living shit out of the other team.  The shit-kickers will win.  I’m taking Cleveland.

St. Louis over Chicago

Nothing more than home team advantage.  Sports pundits can slice and dice this one a hundred ways, but home team is all I’ve got here.

New York Jets over Baltimore

This is an iffy game and you’d have to have read tomorrow’s sports section to actually know who was going to win.  It will be a game of on the ground defense (I know it’s all on the ground, thank you), as the higher scorer of these two low scorers will win.  But I’m still taking The Jets.

Tennessee over Oakland

Who sucks the most here?  I’m still taking Tennessee.

Indianapolis over Arizona

Not sure why Arizona is favored over Indy here.  They either know something we don’t or perhaps the odds makers are just fucking with us.  Take Indy.

New York Giants over Dallas

Dallas beat The Giants in Week 1 when Eli was the…new shitty Eli, but he seems to be returning to the old on the ball Eli. (His receivers could’ve caught a ball, which would have helped also.) Dallas’ owner this week said that they should play the game the way they practice.  Hoping they’ll keep that trend going.  Take The Giants.

Denver over New England

The clash of the old farts.  Brady plays in spurts of on again off again speed, dexterity, and determination.  Peyton is a field controlling crazy man… for the whole freaking game. You can’t beat crazy.

San Francisco over Washington

In a complete turnaround from Sunday’s game, Monday’s game is another meeting of the new guys on the gridiron block.  RG111 has reportedly been taking some locker room flak from the team and public griping from Moss re his on field play and off field attitude.  The Washington defense is practically non-existent.  Take San Francisco. (Never underestimate the power of a previous week’s loss … as Kaepernick did to Newton in their last game.)

NFL PICKS WEEK 8

NFL PICKS WEEK 8

Win Loss = 60-47

This is one of those weeks that should be easy because most games seem so obvious.  That’s a big red flag.  Waving.  One side says “pick me”, the other says, “tricked you, you suck.

That being said, I’m going in anyway:

(picks in pink)

 

Carolina over Tampa Bay

Thursday Night – got that one.

San Fran over Jacksonville in London

British people will still not get American Football after this one.  Ex-Pats might have some ‘splaining to do.

Detroit over Dallas

Megatron and Reggie Bush have their work cut out for them on home field.  Dallas can be a trial for many teams.  Actually in the pool I’m in I don’t have the balls to pick this one so I’m boxing it.  It should be a fight – maybe a few fist fights as well.

Philly over the New York Giants

Both unpredictable teams that are never consistently off or on – taking Philly at home and hopefully Vick propelled.

Kansas City Chiefs over Cleveland

It’s hard to get past the Kansas D even though they’ve used it to stop less than stellar opponents.  Cleveland is going to have to try really really hard.

New Orleans Saints over Buffalo

You know I’m taking the Saints

New England over Miami

This is a long time rivalry, Miami has trouble against the Patriots and Tom Brady, despite that fact that he’s just bought a very cool New York condo, is probably supremely pissed about losing to the Jets last week.

Cincinnati over The New York Jets

Cinci hasn’t lost at home yet and The Jets have managed to lose every other game – on that scientifically gathered data, I’m taking The Bengals

Pittsburgh Steelers over Oakland Raiders

Both AFC both need the game – Pittsburgh always needs it more. Game should be low scoring and Oakland can win at home against a crap team.  Pittsburgh has been improving – AKA – getting their shit game together – of late so on the winds of possibility it’s the Steelers

Denver Broncos over Washington

Will Peyton Manning lose to another rookie QB (compared to him they’re almost all rookies)?  Two weeks in a row?  At home?  I think not.

Atlanta Falcons over Arizona Cardinals

Even a psychic couldn’t pick this one with any certainty.  A psycho perhaps, but I am neither, certainly not on the same day anyway.

Green Bay Packers over Minnesota

Minnesota have lost the plot.  I’ll leave it at that.

Seattle Seahawks over St. Louis Rams

Seattle is just a better team.  Period. I hope.

NFL WEEK 7 … who will win?

NFL WEEK 7 PICKS TO WIN

WEEK 7

Coming into Week 7 @ 52-40

Yes, I let emotion play into that Week 7 Thursday Night pick when I took Arizona over Seattle – won’t let that happen again.  Now in the grand scheme of things I’m one back.  What’s at stake here is a set of Zildjian’s … hi hats or crash or something else loud.  I’ve got my eye on a lovely tablet.  As they say, I’m not playing.  I want my tablet.  Chili in the slow cooker, laundry done, and I’m ready to watch.

New England over the Jets

These two are actually quite well matched and it should be a good game but I’m going with Brady on this one.

San Diego over Jacksonville

Jax still struggling but this could be one of those games you should have boxed but you didn’t because how could San Diego lose?

Kansas City Chiefs over Houston

Schaub is out for Houston and Kansas has a killer D.

Cincinnati Bengals over Detroit

Out on a limb here but Calvin Johnson is “probable” whatever the fuck that means in the real world.  Okay, I know what it means but even when he does play he’s either on or he’s off.  Some games he’s neither.

Miami Dolphins over Buffalo

I would take whoever else there was against Buffalo any day (we’ve been over this before). But I like the Dolphins.  They’re at home.  Ricky would take them.  I think.

Chicago over Washington

Days gone by Washington @ home would be a lock but RG111 is still getting comfortable on that knee (and I don’t blame him).  Chicago is a tough team.

Philly over Dallas

Dallas has some injuries – DeMarcus and DeMarco, Philly’s Vick is questionable.  If Vick is in then Dallas might just spend too much time trying to kick the shit out of him instead of playing.  Big Daddy Jones will be watching though…

Carolina Panthers over St. Louis Rams

Carolina has a good D and Cam Newton (when he doesn’t have that ridiculous towel on his head) seems to be getting back to business.

Atlanta Falcons over Tampa Bay

Just because

Tennessee Titans over San Francisco

Kaepernick is getting back up to speed and he’s throwing the ball well.  Tennessee isn’t going to give up this game lightly.

Green Bay over Cleveland Browns

Even though Green Bay has some injured players they haven’t lost at home yet.  Sometimes it’s that simple.

Pittsburgh Steelers over Baltimore

It could be argued that any team needs any game at any time, but the Steelers need this game.  Really need it.  Defensively both are pretty tough so maybe they should just stay in their own ends and kick the ball back and forth.

Denver Broncos over Indy

The Manning/Luck battle returns to the turf.  Apparently both fathers QB’d … Lucks actually for Indy.  I should know where Manning’s played but I don’t care to find out or to remember.  That was then and this is now.  There is mucho hype surrounding this game because of the return of Peyton to Indianapolis.  But isn’t this a little like going back and sleeping with your ex.  It’s not like it’s a surprise, you know it’s going to end badly for one, and everyone wants to know the details.  Can you imagine how much the networks are charging for advertising during this game?  You can show me a hundred times; I’m still not buying a fucking truck pushed by Denis Leary or Sam Elliot. In fact I’m not buying a truck period.  Show me something else… or show me the freaking game. Did I say I was taking Denver?

Monday night letdown

Taking the New York Giants over Minnesota with hopes Little Manning can play like Big Manning and he and his team can get the job done.

TP&LB